Psychics, Mediums, Friends of the Paranormal
Way back in my younger years, I used to do tarot readings. But I stopped when I was 18. I had several reasons for stopping, but the biggest reason that I stopped was because when I had future flashes of events that would happen later in life they were negative. I tried to use card reading to help me see the positive but still the negative future flashes would not stop.
My first future flash was about a friend of mine getting shot. It was a terrible flash and I was only 14 years old. The flash of the vision was traumatic and I wept all night. Just could not get the vision out of my mind and I thought that I must be a terrible person to see something like that about a friend. Well, the very next day as I was sitting in my classroom I found out that my friend had been shot that morning. He was cleaning a gun with his friend at home instead of coming to school. It still rips my heart out when I think about it. And it was such a terrible event, I started skipping school completely. Fortunately I had people who really reached out to help me. Any way his friend who was cleaning the gun with him went even more mad in the head than I did. Because he physically witnessed the event. His girlfriends had always said that Larry was not the same person after Randy had died. And quite honestly none of us were the same after that. Every once in awhile we talk about it when our old crowd gets back together again. 3 weeks ago, I found out that Larry died from committing suicide. And I found myself not being surprised. He never did really get over Randy dying. And when the news came that Larry was dead, we all started talking about the way that Randy had died. How terrible it was for Larry and for all of us to live through such a tragedy losing our friend that way.
Any way, I had started reading tarot cards at that time to help me to start seeing positive futures in my future flashes. But it never did seem to help. Even though people just loved to have me read their fortune, I still could not get the negative future flashes to stop. I made quite a bit of money doing it.
Well, to this day, I have negative future flashes. So I wondered why. I spent many years thinking that something was just wrong with me. That I was a negative person, that I needed to learn every positive thing that a person could learn to make my future flashes positive. I finally after all of these years realized that what is going on is a lot of negative energy in the world around me. People complaining about driving through traffic, etc. Just plain starting the day out badly. And I for one believe in starting the day out good. I say thank you to the day when the morning arises. I go outside and say thank you to the nature around me for looking so beautiful. I say thank you to the powers that be that give us the opportunity to start out fresh. Then I get in my car, and suddenly the negative future flashes will begin. I see an accident, sure enough there is an accident. Often times I interfere with what I see just to balance it out again back to a more productive outcome. But sometimes I don't have the wisdom to do it. So I see the negative thing and then I experience the negative thing. So it would be different if it was self fulfilled prophesy that I was creating for myself. But it has to do with other people around me. Things that I see other people doing that cause a bad outcome.
Well, anyway, as I was thinking today about Randy and Larry and my reasons for not doing tarot readings for people. I decided that the most important thing about life was to look toward the most positive outcomes that I could make for myself and those who are in relationship with me. I realized a long time ago that there is so much that we can't do anything about. I wish that every person would choose to be positive.
Just recently I had two future flashes that were terrible. I have done everything I can to make a different path that was more positive. Yet, even though I was able to change and soften a little bit of the outcome. Still the events happened and they could not be completely stopped. I have so much to learn. So much to let go of in order to hone this skill into something productive. My good friend Teresa let's me pay her to be my teacher. To stay focused on the positive and to not dwell on the negative. I will keep trying and keep trying to see positive outcomes and a bright future. Thank you Teresa for being willing to help me change and hone my skills for better.